The shape of the day looked like this:

Time Activity
0800-0900 Registration (including coffee)
0900-0915 Intro
0915-1215 Rants (including breaks)
1215-1315 Lunch
1315-1715 Rants (including breaks)
1715-1730 Outro
1730-1830 Food and Drinks
1830-2100 Open Space / Lightning InstaRants

The organised rants were done in an arbitary order from the confirmed list of participants (below) who submitted proposals. From the 100s of proposals we got, we tried to find common themes and people who were able to commit to the rant at the conference.

You’ll notice there is an Open Space / Lightning InstaRant time slot, where attendees gave their own rants. Details of how this worked were given on the day.

Confirmed ranters/rants, in no particular order :

Who On Twitter Rant Transcript
Sal Freudenberg @SalFreudenberg FFS Not everyone likes “thinking on their feet”. »
Kent Beck @KentBeck FFS Fix the small things. Some are bigger than they appear. »
Paul Johnston @PaulDJohnston FFS Containers are a dead technology walking. Serverless is the future. When will the tech world realise this?  
Paula Muldoon @FiddlersCode FFS Get Outside »
Erik Assum @slipset FFS Don’t expect me to be passionate about my work. Passion is for family and hobbies. Work? Moderately enthusiastic at best »
Garth Gilmour @GarthGilmour FFS The browser and everything in it is wrong. We’ve ruined software engineering for generations to come. »
Laurent Bossavit @Morendil FFS take every opportunity to observe how actual users are getting frustrated trying to get their job done with your app  
Dom Davis @idomdavis FFS just f’ing talk to each other! »
Joe Wright @joe_jag FFS Try making one high performing team rather than scaling mediocrity  
Nicola Sedgwick @nicolasedgwick FFS they’re just story points »
Marit van Dijk @Maritvandijk77 FFS Great test automation does not absolve you from manual/exploratory testing »
John S Nolan @johnsnolan FFS The creation and use of software is an amoral and unethical process »